Lack of Substantial Sleep

I am so tired that I am sweating somnolent tears.

Trips of the length of the one I am currently on are extremely unpleasant. Hopefully I shall only have to go to Seminole at the most one more time in my life. From my point of view, living in a distant city with clear and easy connections (travel wise) to most other non po-dunk habitable zones, my father chose one of the worst possible places on earth to live. From his erstwhile point of view, of course, and existing in a tiny bubble, his life in Seminole was perhaps everything he ever wanted. I recall him telling me once that he regretted ever taking Ben or me on any trips at all because those trips put in our heads the desire to explore the “outer reaches”. He would’ve had to shield us from all media and literature, as well, however. But - naturally - there are people who do desire to remain in the shithole where they grew up or in another shithole that resembles the shithole where they grew up.

I’ll possibly be ill again once I’m back in Praha. I need rest. I’ve been awake for 21 hours. I miss Ivanečka. I miss Peiločja.

• Sleep
• Slumber
• Restfulness
• Inactivity that doesn’t involve sitting na letišti nebo v letadle.

Scratch my sticky brow / with maladroit pinkish paws / squinting stickily

My brain is clouded from lack of substantial sleep over the last two weeks - not just from the last 21 hours - so I am aware that making any decisions, and especially decisions of the variety that affect my immediate or even not too distant future in drastic ways is not advisable. However, the thought of moving to Munich at this moment seems both absurd and a little stupid, especially after being in Praha for less than a year. I know it is important to Ivanečka to be close to Luki during his initial stint at university (not everyone is like me - able to relocate and adapt within a few days to a wholly foreign environment), but uprooting myself again after all my careful considerations involving (finally) a semblance of stability feels almost physically painful. I’ll mention once again that my mind is a bit clouded by sleeplessness.